BLOG POST #2 Literary Argument Benchmark Essay Reflection

 

      Benchmark Essay

Familiarity, a feeling of unity, of oneness with the world, the people, the environment around is what every living soul seeks, be it at their workplaces, schools. Colleges, etc, what every living being innately desires is being a part of a connected atmosphere, a community. So is the case in The Alchemist, where the shepherd boy is trapped in his utopic life of stargazing every night while his flock of sheep grazed over the expansive, lush grass that grew atop a hill, but also craved for s for something he subconsciously lacked, and seeked to escape his seemingly perfect life for a higher meaning.

Even Though, the boy lived a life of ease and comfort, in the beautiful pastures of Spain, and felt oneness with his flock of sheep, the mountains, and starry-summer nights, he desired to break free from the shackles of this utopic lifestyle he led. 

The boy awaits for his moment, and receives his answer when he is approached by a king who tells him that there is deeper meaning to his life, and me must seek it to attain self fulfillment, The boy who was eagerly waiting for a sign of some sort believes that this is his calling, his calling for a higher purpose in life and leaves almost instantaneously. 

Once he leaves to the neighboring country, he, just as any human would, misses home. A place where he led a life of simplicity at its best. Months pass by and he is on his mission to fulfill his potential, to discover his higher meaning in life. Afterwhich, he ends up becoming enlightened of his past, present and how he will lead his future.

He realized the deeper reaching for his departure from the perfect life. That home was not the destination, but a layover that he had to face and ‘fuel up’ on for the journey that lay ahead of him. It was like an oasis, that supplemented his growth and led him to meet the King, without whom he wouldn’t be where he was  months later, an enlightened person, with a purpose in life. The Thrill he experienced while stargazing was the Universe he subconsciously desired to know more of, was his sign, the sign that the Universe was listening to him and that he must look beyond the horizon, he called a place of comfort, and discover his purpose in the all-land covering sky that stretched way beyond his humble quarters.

REFLECTION & ONE-ON-ONE HANDOUT

DIRECTIONS: Using your understanding of the scoring guide, score your essay and write a reflection using the following template.

PART 1: SCORE YOUR ESSAY 

1. Use the language of the scoring guide to help you determine this score.

2. Use evidence from your essay to reinforce this score. 

• 1-point for thesis because a defensible claim is made and branches into the “higher meaning” of life expressed through his “trapping”  home. 

• 2-points because the analysis of the meaning of home in the book and the overarching concept of the home is discussed, but does not provide an in-depth analysis of the same, instead it merely touches on the surface of the topic and has not “stretched” beyond the boundaries of simple writing; the essay is a “comfort zone” essay that has kept writing safe and risk-free.

• 0-point for sophistication because even though there is a certain degree of sophistication in the essay, it fails to go“beyond the horizon” and makes use of “restrained” writing, within the “humble quarters” of simple diction and seemingly absent rhetoric. 

PART 2: WRITE A REFLECTION & POST TO YOUR BLOG. USE THIS TEMPLATE. 

DESCRIPTION CCSS.ELA-Literacy.W.11-12.3.d What were you asked to do?  What is being examined?	EXAMPLE:I was asked to write an essay in which I analyzed the symbolic importance of houses and cite evidence from the work of fiction I chose to write about,  and how the meaning of the house adds to the deeper meaning in the book.   I was evaluated on how well I understood the prompt and was expected to clearly articulate the house and its deeper meaning, with evidence backing my defensible thesis, clearly expressing the symbolisms involved around the house, and making use of sophisticated language and skills of writing.
SCORES CCSS.ELA-Literacy.SL.11-12.4  What score did you give yourself? Why? Use the language of the rubric or scoring guide.	I anticipated that I would earn a 1-2-0 because I did provide a defensible thesis, but the following paragraphs did not have an adequate amount of evidence to support the thesis. Though, I was able to analyze and interpret the symbolisms and provide evidence, parts of the essay contained “ irrelavant information” as indicated by “Even Though the boy lived a life of ease and comfort in the beautiful pastures of Spain, and felt oneness with his flock of sheep, the mountains, the starry nights, he desired to break free from the shackles of this utopic life he led.” This is “irrelevant” because these sentences focus on the character versus the symbolism of home.
INTERPRETATION CCSS.ELA-Literacy.SL.11-12.1.c & CCSS.ELA-Literacy.SL.11-12.1.a (Knowledge of scoring guide, sample essays, scoring commentary) How is it similar to and different from other tasks or assessments that we have completed in class?	This essay task was similar to evaluating texts of other students and learning from their mistakes , but in this case our own essays, hence our own mistakes. And we focused on developing a higher level of understanding our current situation and familiarizing ourselves with writing and how we can learn from our texts to become better writers.     This is different from other tasks that we have completed in class because we were required to evaluate our own writing skills and interpret our scores, writing and enlighten ourselves of the skills required to write better.
OUTCOME CCSS.ELA-Literacy.SL.11-12.1.c What have I learned from this about my skill levels at this point? ? What do I need to do to improve my performance on future tasks?	I have understood that my writing needs more fine tuning and has the capacity to get better. I believe that I need to focus more on sophistication, crossing the confines of restricted writing, elaborating on simple concepts with ease, understanding an articulating deeper meaning in texts and ultimately being able to discuss these concepts in an essay with ease.

Adapted from Hampton, M. (2014). Reflective writing: a basic introduction. University of Portsmouth.